Episode 6: Triggers are an Invitation to Heal

Triggers are an invitation to heal within. When we are triggered, we have the opportunity to get super, super curious about our reactions. I’m a big believer in the reaction to the experience is not the obvious. So let me say that again.

When you’re triggered, don’t assume that your reaction, your trigger, is because of the obvious thing that is going on. And let me give you an example. Let’s say you’re driving, someone cuts you off and you get so upset, you maybe start screaming, honking, doing whatever, or maybe you get so angry on the inside, but you don’t say anything out loud. But that particular experience set you off and just created a bad day for you. Maybe that happened. That experience of someone cutting you off is not what is going on in the inside.

Your reaction, your trigger has nothing to do with the person cutting you off. When we are experiencing life, we experience things and we internalize them. And when we internalize them, some of these experiences can be shoved down into our energy field, into our cells be entangled and suppressed for us to process at a later date. This is what trauma does.

And for me, anytime I am triggered by something, I get super, super curious about my reaction. And I want to invite you to do the same. Because when we’re triggered, when we have a particular reaction, that is an invitation to do deeper work and to heal the past trauma within the cells and within our body and within our being, because it is coming to the surface to be processed and healed. Sometimes this trigger can cause a reaction that we attach guilt or shame to. When you are triggered, I want you to not do that.

Take a moment when you’re triggered or after you’re done being triggered to remind yourself you’re safe to explore what’s going on on the inside and that it’s an invitation to heal and to get curious. For me, the other day I was super triggered. It set me off first thing in the morning and I’ll share the story. So my husband and I, my husband and I, we bought a house last year. We’ve been renovating it since last year.

We were supposed to move into our house at the end of November last year, and it didn’t happen. And our move-in date got pushed back, pushed back, pushed back, got pushed back total of six times. And last month we finally weren’t able to stay in our rental anymore. We had to move in and our move-in date came. And the day that we moved in, nothing was complete.

And we have a 16-month-old, so it wasn’t safe for us to stay there. So we had to rent an Airbnb, which was an extra cost, an extra expense. And finally, we’re able to get the space safe enough for us to move in and stop bleeding money, which was also really important. And the other day, I was making food, and I turned the fan on. And the fan is not connected. So it blew all of this dust all over the food.

I got so angry and so upset. And most people, the obvious would be, well, the fan’s not connected. I’m upset because the contractor didn’t do his job. Well, that would be the obvious reason, and I am upset about that.

But my reaction was more than I’m just upset about that. And so I sat down, and I uncensored journaled. I reminded myself I was safe. I got curious about why I was reacting in the way that I was reacting. And so I sat there and I journaled about why I was upset.

And what was revealed while I was journaling was I felt unsupported. I felt unseen. While I was journaling, what was revealed to me on why I was triggered and what was wanting to be healed was past childhood trauma.

I realized I felt unsupported, unseen. I felt like my perfectionist was out of control. And there was a deeper invitation to do more healing around my childhood trauma regarding my stepdad as well. And this all came from me just turning on the fan above my stove that wasn’t connected. And when I was done journaling, all of the anger and all of the pent-up emotions that I had been holding onto because of the fan, because of some of the things that weren’t completed in our house, were able to start to soften and start to release.

And what came to the surface was another invitation to look at the next layer of healing regarding my childhood trauma. This was all done in a very short period of time. I journaled for five minutes total, and I want to invite you anytime you’re triggered to invite yourself to just pause and get curious. And when you get curious, you’re going to experience a new understanding and a new knowing about yourself. And that new knowing might be something you already know, but it’s on a different conscious level of knowing, and that’s really important.

So next time you’re triggered, don’t assume the obvious. Remind yourself you’re safe, and then get curious about your reaction. And then once you get curious and you do a spiritual practice that allows you to uncover what’s going on on the inside, give yourself permission to release and forgive. So I forgave myself for my reaction that morning. And then I released any of the suppressed emotions from childhood that wanted to be released.

And I released them through my pen. I released them through my breath. I released them through my heart. And as I was releasing them, I expressed gratitude as well. Being triggered does not have to ruin your day. It’s just a moment in time.

And remember, you have the opportunity to be in control of your reaction to your reaction. So it’s okay if you have a reaction that isn’t your normal reaction. The next step is getting curious about that reaction so you can start to heal and you deserve to heal as well. So I hope you enjoyed this episode. Make sure you subscribe and I can’t wait to see you in the next one.

Bye.