Episode 103: Healing the Inner Child and Ego to Change Your Life

Have you ever had a moment where you felt that the decision you're about to make could change your life forever? Or maybe you've thought about making some decisions, but you go into fear because if you made that decision, you know that your life will change forever. We have this dance that we do as a human. We dance with our fears.

When we dance with our fears, we have an opportunity to get to know ourselves differently. Most of the time, those fears take over and cripple us, shackling us to the past. Because the past influences your inner child, and the inner child wants to feel safe. The ego wants to feel safe. When the ego and the inner child are in fear, they rather do the very thing that will hurt them because they're familiarized with it.

It's normal. They know what to expect. Unfortunately, when the inner child and the ego dances with fear over and over and over again and chooses the same thing over and over and over again, you start participating in chaos. The definition of chaos is doing the same thing repeatedly, expecting a different result. But what you're getting is the same result. How do you heal this? How do you fix this? How do you change this? It's perception.

You change the perception of dancing with fear with dancing with curiosity, dancing with wonder, dancing with life, dancing with opportunity. But when fear creeps up, you have to remind yourself, you have to remind the ego, you have to remind the inner child that it's safe to go where you haven't gone before. You must also remind the ego and the inner child that you're no longer living in the past. You have to remind the inner child and the ego where you're at at this moment in time and that they're not facing danger. They're not facing the same things they faced when they were 7 or 15 or 20, or 35.

Your inner child never stays the same age. The inner child is slightly younger than you or way younger than you. The inner child and the ego are constantly battling the past. The more that you work with the inner child, the more that you talk with the inner child, the more that you work with the ego, the more that you talk with the ego, the more that they will recognize that they are not living in that space and time. You have to be willing to parent yourself and talk to yourself in a completely different way than you ever have before. You have to be willing to face your fears.

And that's being really honest with what you're scared of. And sometimes you don't even realize that you're scared because you're frozen in time. If you look at something that you experienced in the past with great curiosity, you have the opportunity to unfreeze yourself from that moment in time. Sometimes our health dis-ease within the body is because of a previous traumatic experience. Trauma doesn't have to be a major car accident. It could be a parent telling you no and having aggressive language with it.

It could be a friend from when you were a child or a teenager being mean to you, and that is causing you to retreat, to be reluctant to create relationships. Or maybe you're on the defense all the time because that is how you grew up or that is how you were in a previous romantic relationship. You had to be defensive in order to get what you needed. The more that you start recognizing these patterns and the more that you recognize your truth that you are no longer in that past experience and that you have the opportunity today to change that experience, you have the opportunity to change your life.

You have the opportunity to change your mind. Then this is where we start working beyond the ego in the inner child. We start working with the mental body. This is something I love to talk about, and I love to teach in my Sacred Awakening program, which is the Akashic Record program because this is something where you get to go really in-depth with understanding different parts of yourself.

The more that you get familiar with these parts of yourself and how they're interacting with you, the easier it is for you to identify when you're frozen in fear or when you're posturing in fear, or when you're collapsing in fear. The most important place to be because when we say best versus important, best is this competition, and it's not a competition. It's what is important to you. And that's really important to make that distinction, what is important to you.

So the most important place to be is in the present moment and being mindful of your being, your bodies, the aspects of you that are in fear. And the more that you can get present, the more that you can breathe, and the more ease comes within yourself. And when you're at ease, you're at peace, you get to be in flow. And flow is how you get to participate in your free will in a different way. You're constantly participating in free will, if you like it or not. Your free will, and your thoughts are sending out those signals.

If you are telling the universe that you're in fear, you're in fear, you don't want this, you don't want that, you hate this, you hate that, your whatever spirit, the universe says, Okay, you want that? Here you go. Let me reinforce that belief. Let me reinforce that truth. Because there are energies that want to support your truth at all times. So you have to be so diligent and so curious about changing your truths. And you start by recognizing that you have the will to change.

You start by talking with these different aspects of yourself. And instead of dancing with fear, you are dancing with life. You're dancing with curiosity, and you are in flow. You are telling the universe. You're telling different aspects of yourself; I love you. We deserve to be in the present moment. We deserve to have something different. We deserve to love each other. I love you, and I'm going to participate in loving you in a different way that you never received before. You are the only person that can love yourself the way that you know you're meant to be loved.

Don't expect someone to guess what's going on internally in your mind. When you leave it up to chance, those relationships will always fail you. What I mean by that is nobody's a mind reader. Yes, they can anticipate moves, but you know what? If you are just honest and truthful on how you're feeling and what expectations you expect, and what needs you are wanting to be met, then those people in your life can show up for you in a completely different way.

And if you start being honest with yourself in these different aspects of yourself, these ways of communicating with yourself will automatically ripple out into your relationships. And how cool is that? How amazing is that? How powerful is that? You can be exactly who you need you to be. Let me say that slightly differently so you completely understand what it is that I'm saying. You get to show up in your life and support you, your inner child, and your ego in a way that no one else has ever supported you.

And what ends up happening is your free will kicks in, and you tell the universe, you tell the Cosmos, you tell your guardians, your guides, your angels, Creation, this is what I expect in life. This is what I desire. This is the support that I require in order to vibrate at the frequency that I am wanting to vibrate at. And I opened my heart, I opened my mind for you to deliver this to me because I know I am worthy. I know that I am whole. I know that you will deliver this to me. And then you have to put that belief in your heart. And once you believe in it, things will start to change.

And do they change like that? Absolutely not. Because you've been wiring. You've been in this matrix of a life that you have created, a reality that you have created. And so it takes some time, just like if you have to restart your computer, you have to turn it off, the system has to shut down, then the system has to reboot, and then it has to reorganize it. So just like you, once you make your mind up, you reinforce it with practice, beliefs, thoughts, words, deeds, and patterns. If you try it for one hour, will your life completely change?

No, it's a practice of the art of living in your authenticity, the art of living in your truth, the art of living in a vibrational reality that you're truly wanting to create that has support, love, and amazing, amazing love for yourself and for others. The inner child will thank you for this. The ego will thank you for this. You will start to recognize that there are so many beautiful opportunities around you because you've released the fear of participating in the reality that you truly want and you truly desire.

I want you to take a breath and breathe it all in because I'm like, I could just feel this energy that's wanting to come forward and wanting to come through to share with you today. And I want you to just breathe this new truth in. And when you're breathing it in, I want you to tell yourself, I am whole, I am powerful, I am true to myself, I am true to you. And I want you to imagine your inner child is in front of you, and you're saying, I am true to you. I love you. I support you. I want to be with you.

And you can even imagine doing this to your ego as well. And these parts of you may be reluctant, and that is perfectly okay. That is perfectly okay. Because guess what? You have to rebuild trust with them. You have to rebuild a relationship with them. You have to get to know yourself in a completely different way in order to make true, long-lasting changes. I know for me when I used to be super negative, like very, very negative self-talk, I would constantly call myself dumb or stupid, make a blonde joke, whatever it was.

It wasn't until years after I made the decision to stop talking to myself that I made a quick sarcastic joke where I'm like, Oh, that felt icky. Where did that come from? At that moment, I recognize I haven't said something negative about myself to myself or as a joke to someone else in a really long time. And so, at first, it might feel very hard to do this. I'm going to tell you, the more you work on it, the more you practice it, the easier it becomes where it's just one day you stop doing it.

And you might be on your journey already, and you might have been on your journey for quite some time, and you're like, but I've been doing that, and I feel good about myself. But what's next? Get really honest with yourself on the subconscious thoughts that are holding you back, the negative subconscious beliefs that are holding you back. Because the more that we work on the subconscious, the easier it is for you to reparent and love the inner child.

The inner child and the ego are holding and working with the subconscious on a consistent basis. And so the more that you work with these aspects of your being, the more the subconscious will reveal itself to your conscious mind. And that's where true change can really happen. So get curious. You deserve to get super curious. And the more that you get curious, the more that you will change the reality, and the more that you will start supporting yourself in a completely different way.

You deserve it, my friend. You absolutely deserve it.